Tuesday, July 27, 2010

I'm delicate, so sue me.

Panic over people, deet has become my very close friend and I am a mozzie buffet no more. I smell a treat mind. I’m not making any promises but I’m hoping that this blog will now revolve around my travels rather than my numerous bodily & mental issues. As I said, I’m not promising owt.

So! Back to the matter at hand! Rather than drone on (and also as I seem to be suffering from train-lag….more on this later) I thought some snappy descriptions of various sights and events should suffice no?

Myself and Master Southern are noe happily ensconced in out hostel in Irkutsk awaiting our SEVEN FORTY FIVE AM bus that takes SIX HOURS to Lake Olkhon on Lake Baikal tomorrow. Wooooooooo! Tres excited for many reasons not least that it has fat little fresh water seals, it supposed to be stunning, we can relax for a few days in solitude and…..wait for it, it gets down to 10 degrees in the evening so I can wear my jeans again…..oh I have missed them so.

In reverse chronological fashion we have done the following…just got off the longest train journey that I have done and, quite frankly, hope to ever do to get here. 86 hours and 5100kms of a trip from Moscow to Irkutsk. I know that train journeys, especially the trans-siberian, are supposed to be of a romantic and adventurous nature but I have now found out that I am not one of nature’s long distance train travellers. Me in close proximity to total strangers for extended periods of time is never a good idea as we all know, locking toilets countless times throughout the day has an immediate and extremely negative effect on my bladder and a diet of crisps, nutella, bread, noodles and 1 boiled egg (I hear you Mel Espie) plays absolute havoc on my delicate institution. Last but not least having a doubtless very friendly buryat soldier sharing with us whom I christened Starsey McStare did fray the edges of my temper somewhat. What, can’t I hop up and down whilst waiting for the toilet to be unlocked in peace? Humph. After all that I still can’t process the fact that I am in Siberia, home of the exiles! Some of the scenery from the train was beautiful especially the this fog as we rolled into a tiny station at the middle of the night. I so want to do this trip in winter (with plentiful stops and a ban on staring cubicle companions).

Before this, Moskva! So many events in such a small time. Numero Uno an older Swedish couple who we shared with in our hostel. Mary mother of Jesus I have never heard such varied and synchronised snoring in my life. I was so fascinated I couldn’t even get up the steam to be annoyed…well not until she asked if we were going to stay in bed all day at 10 am after a particularly fine performance by them both, cheeky “*£”%. To give you a written description of this aural brilliance…he sounded like he was drowning in a vat of something extremely sticky, molasses? and she sounded like she was systematically shaving off a layer of her through every time she breathed in. And what was particularly pleasing is as soon as she stopped he started and vice versa. Amazing.

Back to Moskva….wasn’t over whelmed if I’m honest, however, the kremlin and red square are incredible vast spaces where you just breathe in all the history. I spent a particularly long time inspecting the spot where a fake tsar (Polish according to Jannis) was pulled apart by horses. Dead Lenin was also on our must-see list. Weird, very very weird is all I can say. The place was all dim lights, shiny black marble and red velvet. Couldn’t decide whether the look they were going for was Dracula’s master bedroom or a kinky strip club in Japan (muddled memories of Tokyo with Abena…). Either way I came out feeling all funny I have to say. Not as funny as poor Lenin I’m sure. Oh and one other thing to note…they have the most gargantuan McDonalds I have ever seen on Pushkinskaya Square if anyone is interested. My mind boggled. Oh and mother, I saw real live Faberge eggs in the armoury! Fantabulous.


I could write more but I promised to be snappy and blatantly lied. More to follow in a week or so, probably from Mongolia!

Piccies on facebook!
Miss Nicholas

I'm delicate, so sue me.

Panic over people, deet has become my very close friend and I am a mozzie buffet no more. I smell a treat mind. I’m not making any promises but I’m hoping that this blog will now revolve around my travels rather than my numerous bodily & mental issues. As I said, I’m not promising owt.

So! Back to the matter at hand! Rather than drone on (and also as I seem to be suffering from train-lag….more on this later) I thought some snappy descriptions of various sights and events should suffice no?

Myself and Master Southern are noe happily ensconced in out hostel in Irkutsk awaiting our SEVEN FORTY FIVE AM bus that takes SIX HOURS to Lake Olkhon on Lake Baikal tomorrow. Wooooooooo! Tres excited for many reasons not least that it has fat little fresh water seals, it supposed to be stunning, we can relax for a few days in solitude and…..wait for it, it gets down to 10 degrees in the evening so I can wear my jeans again…..oh I have missed them so.

In reverse chronological fashion we have done the following…just got off the longest train journey that I have done and, quite frankly, hope to ever do to get here. 86 hours and 5100kms of a trip from Moscow to Irkutsk. I know that train journeys, especially the trans-siberian, are supposed to be of a romantic and adventurous nature but I have now found out that I am not one of nature’s long distance train travellers. Me in close proximity to total strangers for extended periods of time is never a good idea as we all know, locking toilets countless times throughout the day has an immediate and extremely negative effect on my bladder and a diet of crisps, nutella, bread, noodles and 1 boiled egg (I hear you Mel Espie) plays absolute havoc on my delicate institution. Last but not least having a doubtless very friendly buryat soldier sharing with us whom I christened Starsey McStare did fray the edges of my temper somewhat. What, can’t I hop up and down whilst waiting for the toilet to be unlocked in peace? Humph. After all that I still can’t process the fact that I am in Siberia, home of the exiles! Some of the scenery from the train was beautiful especially the this fog as we rolled into a tiny station at the middle of the night. I so want to do this trip in winter (with plentiful stops and a ban on staring cubicle companions).

Before this, Moskva! So many events in such a small time. Numero Uno an older Swedish couple who we shared with in our hostel. Mary mother of Jesus I have never heard such varied and synchronised snoring in my life. I was so fascinated I couldn’t even get up the steam to be annoyed…well not until she asked if we were going to stay in bed all day at 10 am after a particularly fine performance by them both, cheeky “*£”%. To give you a written description of this aural brilliance…he sounded like he was drowning in a vat of something extremely sticky, molasses? and she sounded like she was systematically shaving off a layer of her through every time she breathed in. And what was particularly pleasing is as soon as she stopped he started and vice versa. Amazing.

Back to Moskva….wasn’t over whelmed if I’m honest, however, the kremlin and red square are incredible vast spaces where you just breathe in all the history. I spent a particularly long time inspecting the spot where a fake tsar (Polish according to Jannis) was pulled apart by horses. Dead Lenin was also on our must-see list. Weird, very very weird is all I can say. The place was all dim lights, shiny black marble and red velvet. Couldn’t decide whether the look they were going for was Dracula’s master bedroom or a kinky strip club in Japan (muddled memories of Tokyo with Abena…). Either way I came out feeling all funny I have to say. Not as funny as poor Lenin I’m sure. Oh and one other thing to note…they have the most gargantuan McDonalds I have ever seen on Pushkinskaya Square if anyone is interested. My mind boggled. Oh and mother, I saw real live Faberge eggs in the armoury! Fantabulous.


I could write more but I promised to be snappy and blatantly lied. More to follow in a week or so, probably from Mongolia!

Piccies on facebook!
Miss Nicholas

Saturday, July 17, 2010

Symmetry is the key. As is sushi.

Couple of facts that I have learnt over the past couple of days.

1. it's true, mozzies really do love me. In fact they are getting damnably artistic about their craft, 1 shiny red lump in the middle of my stomach, 1 on each (facial cheek). Awesome.
2. Russian men are generally unattractive. Russian boys have potential but completely waste it.....mullets galore.
3. St Petersburg is beeeyoootiful. Grand, stunning, elegant, steeped in history and strangely for a hot city...not smelly. Still messes my hair up though.
4. Learning the cyrillic alphabet is HARD! I look like a 3 year old reading street signs phonetically.
5. Russian woman all have superhuman bodies through copious consumption of sushi. And not much else.

Other than that all is well on the eastern front, gearing up for our visit to Moscow (have heard nothing good from the locals here) and our 85 hour trip to Lake Baikal.

Last but not least, anyone who knows me at all will have heard my rant about HSBC....local bank my a%)e. You'll all, no doubt, be pleased to hear that we cannot use our HSBC cards in the one HSBC bank here as they don't accept our particular chips. And you cannot withdraw money from the bank teller. Who isn't in work anyway today. Was about to explode into volcanic anger when Al beat me to the post. Which of course cheered me up no end. Anything to do with money......